Start With Yourself: How to Get into the Arena

“All serious daring starts from within.”

–Harriet Beecher Stowe

 

 This post is the fifth of a series called “Start with Yourself,” a how to guide to live like a hero on your quest to change the world. You don’t have to have read the others to understand this one, but if you like it, you might want to read the call to adventure, why we refuse the call,  how to say yes, and how to begin. Sign up in the box to the right to be sure not to miss a thing 🙂

When you first start out to do something new, to try something big — either right before or right after you take that first small but significant step — you will be challenged.

 

Never fear, hero — it’s all part of the quest.  You’ve met your threshold guardian.

 

The Threshold Guardian

 

In epic stories, there are all kinds of threshold guardians.  Some are stationed to keep out the unworthy, like Fluffy the three-headed dog in Harry Potter and the Sorcerer’s Stone, there to block out Lord Voldemort and his henchmen who would use the stone for nefarious purposes.

 

Some are there to stop the uncommitted, or to make sure the unwary don’t wander into a dangerous situation naive and unaware, like most sergeants in combat movies, or Shang, the captain from Disney’s Mulan.

 

Some of them are henchmen of the ultimate enemy or final challenge,  like mini mobsters who patrol the boss’ turf.

 

Some of them are meant to become guides and allies, some are just meant to be defeated or snuck past.  Some of them may even be your own doubts, fears, or limiting beliefs.

 

But no matter what their motive, threshold guardians are the first big test.  Threshold guardians are meant to keep the simply curious away, and the uncommitted, unworthy, and unready out.  The challenge they offer is meant to throw you off, knock you down, and keep you from the adventure in the first place.

 

But your job, if you want to fulfill your mission, is to get past the guardian — into the arena.

 

 

Meeting your Guardian

 

Your guardian might find you right as you go to step out the door.  Or into the new adventure you’ve finally decided to accept.

 

The challenge could come from a concerned family member, a well-meaning friend, or the natural gatekeeper to a place you’ve never been before, and come in a form as unassuming as, “Aren’t you afraid you might be a bit [old/young/overqualified/under-qualified/insert adjective here]? or a subtle, “do you really think it’s a good idea to [do your thing]?”

 

Or it might come in the form of an all out challenge — a shocked, outraged, appalled shout of some of the scariest words any socially-interested person can hear: how DARE you?

 

 

Knowing Your How

 

Wait — that’s a good question. How DO you dare?   And as your instigator, your champion, your co-conspirator, and fellow schemer, I, too, want to know: how dare you?

 

I am so serious, and I ask it with love and all sincerity:  HOW will you dare?

 

Please don’t misunderstand me.  I am in no way implying that you should not.  I just want to know how.

 

Seriously.  How?

 

When you step out to make big changes in the world, to live the life of your dreams, to create and inspire and make and heal, HOW will you dare?

 

What values will you hold dear? What practices or principles will you commit to?  Will you dare with integrity? With love? With truth? Will you commit to assuming goodness? To supporting empowerment and freedom, even if it contradicts your agenda?  What do you commit to, on this journey of yours?

 

HOW will you dare?

 

 

Getting Past Your Guardian

 

However your challenge looks, sneaky or shocking, you will be tested.  You can either let this challenge feed your internal doubt and crumple you from the inside out … or you can meet it.

 

Say: “I have business here.”  You don’t have to know what the path is, or where it’s going — you just have to know how you will commit to walk it.

 

Then — DECLARE how you dare.

 

It may have been a sarcastic question, but you will meet it with a response of sincere conviction.

 

Tell them to what you are committed.  For what values.  For what purpose.  Those are the pieces of how you dare.

 

Tell them. Because a guardian’s challenge, no matter who or what that guardian is, is ultimately part of your quest.  and the gift of the guardian, no matter what his motive, is the opportunity to hear the first deep truths of your journey come out of your own mouth.

 

You are worthy if you are showing up fully yourself, because you have a mission, even if you can’t fully articulate it yet.

 

This is how you show your commitment.  This is how you show your worth.  Show up.  Declare.

 

 

Declaring How You Dare: A Daring Mini-Manifesto

 

Do it now.  Take a deep breath. Rally your courage.  And fill in the blanks:

 

How will I dare?

 

I might not know __________________________________________ .

 

I may not be able to articulate ________________________________________  (yet).

 

I haven’t reached the full depth of my _______________________________________

 

or the height of my  _____________________________________  (yet).

 

But I DO know that I feel called to  ____________________________________

 

and intrigued by  ____________________________________________

 

and compelled by  ______________________________________

 

And I’m going to do this.   Even if no one else gets it.

 

I’m stepping out.

 

I am going to DARE —

 

with _____________________________ ,     with  _________________________________

 

and  ____________________________________ ,      by  _____________________________.

 

That’s how.

 

Walk on

 

Declaring how you dare is like holding up a torch in a cave.  It won’t stop you from being afraid of the dark, but it will help you step out into the darkness anyway.

 

Accept that your mission might not be crystal clear — yet . That you don’t yet know the way.  That you don’t have all the answers.  That you, exactly, beautifully, as you are, may not have everything right now that you will need for this quest — yet.  And go on anyway.

 

So — How will YOU dare?

 

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This week’s “start with yourself” challenge:

 

Fill in the blanks and declare how you dare… then be even more daring, and share them here! 🙂  

Bonus points: Click here to print the pretty pdf of the “How I Dare” mini-manifesto, and post it with your answers somewhere where you can see it when you wake up in the morning, or when you’re working.  Even save a picture of it on your phone so you can see it when you’re prone to get distracted 🙂

Be daring!

 

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